and our cracking bones make noise

one month, two weeks.

and then...well, another change. graduation and becoming an alumnus of both kansas state and kappa. so strange. a time i NEVER thought would come, just like i felt about coming to college.

i love when my room is always dark. we call it our "emo" room time. we blame it on the eco-lympics (saving the world, one light bulb at a time), but i think we all just like it this way.

it's snowed. i didn't like it.
now it's all slushy. i still don't like it.

i've almost successfully watched all of 30 rock in three days. i have to come up with the ideas for my episode by tuesday and cannot change them. yikes. i need to start brainstorming.

april 3&4 = spring dance
april 8 = ben folds
april 10 = tricia's 21st
april 12 = easter
april 14 = tiffany's 22nd
april 15 = kylie's 21st
april 17 = formal
april 23-27 = personal long weekend
april 29 = kels/krista's 22nd

april showers bring may flowers...

and scare laura half to death because she has no life plan and no clue where she'll be living in six weeks...but it's whatever.

whatever i touch

what i really enjoy about leaving kappa most: softer toilet paper.

there are very few things that i like about leaving kappa, but that is one of them. this morning i was rudely reminded that we do not have soft toilet paper. it is quite the opposite.

i suppose that can be something i can look forward to when i get my own place.

lately the future has been stressing me out. i'm trying to think of new options for my living situation, but the more options i get, the more stressed out i get, and the more stressed out i get, the more emotional i get, and the more emotional i get, the more i want to shut down and cry and the more i want to shut down and cry, the more i get frustrated with myself because i am not in control; never have been, never will be.

when will my tiny little mind accept the fact that i am not the one making the calls in my life?

it's going to be okay

...and i just wanna be ok, be ok, be ok, i just wanna be ok today. i just wanna know today, know today, know today, i just wanna know something today...

don't get lost in the crowd

Think of 25 albums that had such a profound effect on you they changed your life or the way you looked at it. They sucked you in and took you over for days, weeks, months, years. These are the albums that you can use to identify time, places, people, emotions. These are the albums that no matter what they were thought of, they musically shaped your world. They stood up, they lasted, they mattered. They still matter, in some way (even if only in memory). When you finish, tag 25 others, including me. Make sure you copy and paste this part, yadda yadda yadda. Doesn't have to be The 25. Just the 25 Right Now, as memory and listening demand. In no necessary order.

*These are more...albums that really take me down memory lane. Not necessarily life changing.

1. Alanis Morissette - Under Rug Swept
2. The O.C. Mix 1
3. Mindless Self Indulgence - You'll Rebel to Anything
4. The All-American Rejects (self titled album)
5. Avril Lavigne - Let Go
6. Ben Folds Five - Whatever & Ever Amen
7. *NSYNC - No Strings Attached
8. Into the Woods (original Broadway cast)
9. New Radicals - Maybe You've Been Brainwashed Too
10. Center Stage soundtrack
11. Garden State soundtrack
12. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois
13. A Walk to Remember soundtrack
14. Coldplay - A Rush of Blood to the Head
15. Death Cab for Cutie - Plans
16. Eisley - Combinations
17. Queen - Greatest Hits
18. Michael Jackson - History (I & II)
19. OK Go (self titled album)
20. Radiohead - OK Computer
21. Good Charlotte - Young and the Hopeless
22. Ingrid Michaelson - Girls and Boys
23. Rocket Summer - Calendar Days
24. Meatloaf - Bat Out of Hell (I & II)
25. Mika - Life in Cartoon Motion

i will be waiting

tell me that i:
-have small feet.
-have a cute forehead.
-am the funniest girl you know.

offer:
-me panera soup when i'm sick.
-to pay for my ice cream/coffee.
-me hugs when i'm feeling down.

...and i'm so happy.

(okay...that was the cute post that the bachelor ruined. sorry for the cheese.)

giving up

i had a cute post i was going to put.
but then the bachelor happened.

i don't care who you are, but you do not break up with someone on national television. no matter what the circumstances. no. never. what a tool. i just hope for his sake that they made him do it because he signed his life away or something. and abc made him do it.

i hate abc. but i love lost. i am so conflicted right now.

sigh.

i hate how emotionally invested i can get into reality tv. it's just such a sucker of emotions and energy and time.

so, now, i move on to finish my take home test and prepare for a fun road trip tomorrow.

jason...you are an idiot.

no other hope, no other way

i love spending 7 hours on an application only to be rejected.
i also love spending over a month preparing and submitting an application only to be rejected.

growing up kind of sucks.

in other news, britney turned 21 and i am ecstatic. but being the dd isn't all it's cracked up to be.

this weekend my mom and i are hitting the ville. i am more than stoked.

my iTunes shuffle has really been sub-par lately.

you remind me of the babe...the babe with the power...

transmitting on my frequency

roadkill i passed today:

1. tabby cat (that looked way too much like my first cat)
2. puppy
3. skunk
4. large bird
5. skunk #2
6. unidentified lump of blood and flesh
7. another bird/version of #6
8. skunk #3

reasons why dancing all day every day is great:

1. toning my body
2. more flexible
3. feel better about myself
4. tights/leo make me feel skinnier
5. make new friends
6. it's fun
7. no homework
8. feel creative

reasons why dancing all day every day is awful:

1. feet wounds
2. constantly sore
3. back knots
4. blisters
5. floor burns
6. constantly tired
7. no real classes = not feasible to add a major to extend time in college
8. if i get hurt, i am screwed