somewhere in detroit

Some things just aren't as exciting as they used to be.
And then you have to re-evaluate decisions you've made about the future life you want. Is that really the way it's "supposed" to be? After all these years of planning...

I like splurging on little things.
For instance:

expensive soaps/bubble baths at work
-or-
fancy pants stationery/stamps/paper from Paper Source
-or-
slippers/pajama pants/underwear

Things that you can find for a decent/inexpensive price I just LOVE getting when they are FANCY and PRICEY. It almost makes me feel like I'm giving myself a little treat.

After my shift tonight, I bought some things in our store for family members, and splurged on a shiny, gold, glittery bubble bar and a sea salt gorgeous blue colored bath bomb. Why? They smelled good and we call that bath cocktail (aka combination) "the drunken mermaid" and I HAD to try it.

But, why spend the money I'm barely making on things I don't necessarily need? The world may never know.

And, why do I over invest myself in people who show me nothing in return?
Or, better yet, overshare with people who are really important to me about topics that are sensitive and may alter what they think about me?

Yes, you're probably right. It's time for me to go to sleep.

tell me something pretty

New life goal:

To see the Radio City Rockettes' Christmas Spectacular in NYC.

This would simultaneously allow me to fulfill another life goal:

Be in NYC during the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year's Eve time. Not necessarily on those days (because it would be crazy) but the huge tree needs to be up at Rockefeller Center, and I need to be there.

I finally made my Christmas playlist for my iPod. Listening to "The Nutcracker" is always so nostalgic. If only I didn't think ballets were so boring. Maybe after dancing this past semester my appreciation will be strengthened and if/when I ever see "The Nutcracker" again I can just love it and feel like a little kid. Or just be pissed at myself for quitting dance and letting my first big life goal of being Clara go completely out the window. And only amounting to be a mouse three years in a row. Ha.

Okay. Back to job searching.

Any suggestions?

baby, it's cold outside

"Tori, I promise we can make it to your school. It's not that cold out. When I was at K-State I would walk further to school and it was way colder and sometimes it would be SNOWING. I made it, and you can, too."

Yep. I had my first "Grandma" moment this morning.
I'm getting old.

how does it feel

I never want to be the mother of teenage daughters. Maybe one, definitely not two or more. Unless, of course, I have multiple daughters, then I would rather go through the HORRIBLE TERRIBLE teen years with them than have them be kidnapped or killed or something. Anything else? Nope. Teenage girls are crazy. I feel so sorry for my mother and every teacher in the world. No explanation for their crazy tendencies.

I'm "babysitting" two of my cousins who are teens this weekend. And...wow. One is the bad one. And usually these two are my favorites to just hang out with, but holy crap! Try and get her to clean up a mess and it is like you are speaking in a foreign language.

Maybe all children are like this. In that case, maybe my life dream of being a stay at home mom just ended.

Instead, I'll own my own store of LUSH so I can wear my sparkle tights every day and only have to deal with the children for the .5 seconds they are in my store.

Life update: the job search has restarted in full force. Since my seasonal position at LUSH ends on New Year's Eve, I have to start looking...again. This cycle never seems to end. Whoo.

My coffee tastes awful today.
Ick. Seriously.

(8 days. CRAZY. Crazy good, that is.)